Category Archives: Waiting

The agonizing wait for cancer test results

Sleepy Time

Once again I have slept most of the day away lol. I just can’t hang with the big dogs anymore. Actually, I didn’t realize the tea I was drinking last night was not decaf so my wonderful sleep aids were not as effective. I did however, manage to get most of my packing done and solve the mystery of who decorated my house lol. My kids had the time of their lives on the party bus last night. I’m sooo glad! I just wanted them to have a night to cut loose with no worries and no stress. They have been so brave and have handled all of this so well but, it has been scary for them and I know they worry. So a night out was just what momma ordered! We were all together tonight for a birthday dinner for Mimi (my Mom) and seeing some of the videos and photos from the partying that went on were hilarious!!! Mom enjoyed her birthday and we all enjoyed each other. I will stamp this weekend a success!!! Hope you all enjoyed your weekend! Keep the Faith!

Midnight Decorating

Okay who’s responsible for sending me in to an early morning cry? I LOVE IT!!! I am so blessed with such amazing friends. Thank you for thinking of me and braving the cold just to let me know I’m not alone. I’m truly humbled. I love you guys.1689941_10203200557633377_259221094_n 1609840_10203200558073388_265408397_n

Getting my affairs in order

1012676_10202095470041746_212071397_nI spent the day with my baby girl. I needed to pick up some things (yes I wore my mask and used hand sanitizer like it was going out of style) for my trip and finish getting my affairs in order (tax info, bills, yadda, yadda). I mean you would think my bills would be on hold until I’m done being sick but, hell to the no! I still haven’t packed my bags yet – not sure if I’m procrastinating or just not real worried about it. I will pack tomorrow it’s a must as I’m having dinner with friends (at their home no public adventure) Saturday night and Sunday is a Pizza Party for my Mom’s Bday and a family hoopla before I go. Monday, Haena and I are getting Pedicures (yes I’m wearing a mask). I can’t go to Barnes with yuckie feet – My God what will they think? I’m leaning toward a hot pink color so I will think of white sand beaches and warm weather (well hopefully). Hope you all had a fabulous Friday and wishing a peaceful weekend. Keep the Faith!

You are still a Mom even if you have Cancer lol

I have no time for this cancer crap I’m too busy being a Mom (lol). So as you know last night was our traditional birthday hoopla. After, the celebration Haena left with her friend Whitney and went to K&K – an experience one must have at 21 (especially on a Tuesday Night ha,ha). I watched Chicago Fire and at 10:00pm I took all of my meds including my sleep aids. At 10:18pm I receive a text (lucky I heard it) from Haena stating she probably shouldn’t drive home. I told her I would drive her home and just spend the night at her house (she lives in Carlinville). I told her she better get her butt here soon or I will be comatose (LOL). She was a giggly mess – kinda funny actually. She was not drunk by all means but, was sure tipsy. As we drove I said “Well, isn’t this nice? The ‘ol bald headed mother with cancer has to drive her drunk ass daughter home and hoping her sleep aids don’t kick in!” We both cracked up laughing. We had to be up early as Haena had to work and I had to get labs. Wouldn’t have been so bad except I didn’t sleep well of course. I convinced my Mother that I would drive myself for labs today as the dog needed to go to the groomers and we couldn’t be in 2 places at once. I went for labs, dropped some clothes off to my stepsister as her baby is sick and in Pedi at Saints (yes I wore my mask and didn’t touch anything nor did I go in the baby’s room). Picked up a check from my stepsister so I could pay her water bill – dropped it off and then received a call from my Dad that my Mom had locked the keys in the truck at Carlinville Walmart. SOOOOOO I head to Girard, pick up the key and travel to Carlinville to yet again SAVE THE DAY! LOL. See what I mean? I have no time for this Cancer Crap I’m too busy saving lives, people. Needless to say, when I got home I grabbed a bite to eat and then slept for 3 1/2 hours (well deserved I believe). Best part of the whole day was………….my labs are back to normal (I say that loosely) and do not have to go back anymore!!!! Whoop Whoop! All I do now is wait for Tuesday to come and southbound we go (wish it was somewhere warm with a beach front view)! Hope your Hump Day was easy breezy! Thanks for hangin with me. Keep the Faith!

Oh what a day

1009985_10202090832125801_1526304821_nWhat a long Freakin Day!!!!!! Got labs done at 9:30am, went to day hospital to get a shot because, the insurance company failed to send the other 7 shots that I need UGH!. Looked up my labs while I was there so I knew I would be getting blood products…….BINGO – needed 1 unit of Platelets (plugs the holes of a wound) and 2 units of red blood cells (the oxygen carriers). Day hospital to not do those today soooo I had to be admitted to 3rd floor Oncology and we got the party started about 1:30pm – arrived home at 10:30. Now this is not what I had in mind for Friday LOL. I should have more energy for the weekend because, of the red blood cells (at least I can get to the bathroom and back without panting like a dog). Hope your Friday was uneventful and you all enjoy a nice weekend. Keep the Faith!

Last day of freedom

ImageLast day of freedom, kind of a bittersweet. I’m ready to get this crap over with yet, I don’t want to be away from my family and friends. I know what’s facing me and I am just on in the mood lol. Hope this trip flies by so we can get on to the next one. I had another baby fix today as my friend Julie brought her granddaughter over (she’s 5 months), just loved it. Babies make all your worries go away. I had a baby fix yesterday too as I got to love on my friend Tammy’s granddaughter (she’s almost 8 months). They melt my heart and are such a blessing. Had Dicarlos pizza for dinner with Haena, Tyson, and Mom &Dad. You know you can’t leave town without having Dicarlos. Broc, Ashley and kids weren’t able to come but, I ran by and gave him a hug before I left (emotional). Dropped off Tshirts and THANK YOU from the bottom of my heart for those who purchased. I’m not good at receiving, it makes me very uncomfortable. I get more joy out of giving. I have all of my junk packed up, you know the usual clothes, pj’s, dorm room decor, sheets, blankets, pillows. I know I sound like someone of real importance don’t I? Maybe I could go Brittany Spears I mean she was bald once, right? Guess, maybe I am high maintenance. LOL Check in tomorrow will be at 10 AM, probably hydration fluids first and then chemo hopefully by late afternoon. I will post on the days events tomorrow. Keepin the faith!

“Fiddle Farting” – a shout out to Mylas

1275506_506797006078172_1618050570_oNo fever, no fever, hip hip hurray! Must have been hormonal lol. It’s a beautiful day and I told my nephew on Tuesday as long as the weather was decent I would watch him play JFL Football. You couldn’t ask for a better day! My chauffeur (my Mother) drove to Rochester to watch the 4th Grade Chatham Titans White play some ball. They won which was even better. I have to chuckle because, I’m giving a shout out to Mylas (last name not mentioned because I didn’t have him sign a release to use his full name lol) for using the word of the day………….”Fiddle Farting”. Now he was referring to a ref who was flag happy and apparently is at all Titan games. I know the guy wanted to use another word instead of “Fiddle Farting” but, it was a children’s game and that’s what came out of his mouth. I loved it! I told him he would be mentioned in my blog ( – forgot to mention that’s up and running now. I’m going to use that word along with my saying of “I can because I have cancer.” I’m not going to “fiddle fart” around I’m going to get this shit going and kick cancer in the ass! LOL Any – there it is Mylas – a shout out! Way to go Titans, it was fun watching my nephew and I have to say I even get a kick out of my brother in law coaching. He’s so competitive but, awesome with the kids. – Good job, Bruce I’m proud! Going to eat a bite and make some deliveries. I’m soaking in as much of this day as I can. Tomorrow is my last day of freedom and then I’m incarcerated at the John. (guess I probably shouldn’t put incarceration as for someone new looking at this may really think I am going back to jail lol). Oh, met a guy (A grandpa of one of the kids on the football team), he’s been battling cancer since 2011. They told him he only had 6 months and he’s still going – have to say he looks great. Now he doesn’t have what I have but, his story was amazing and just gives me more fuel to keep fighting. He kept the faith and so shall I!

Waiting for information

Waiting for test results
Let’s get on with it already!

I called Barnes hospital today because, I had not heard from anyone yet. I swear you have to stay on top of everyone or you fall through the cracks. Anyway, I was told I could come next week and I told them that was not going to work as I was going to be admitted back to St. John’s for another month. She put me on hold and miraculously found an available time for me this Wednesday at 10:15am. I can’t wait to see if they can help me and what their recommendations are if any. Just want a more concrete plan. Positive thoughts, positive thoughts.

Went and got a pedicure this afternoon – OMG it felt sooo good. My feet are horrible since they were burned by the chemo. I can’t wait until they are back to normal. At least my polish looks good and winter is coming so flip flop weather will be no longer lol. Just want my feet to look good before I go back to the John.

Thanks for stopping in. Keep the Faith!

If I were 20

My partying last night has caught up to me today. I slept till about 10AM, stayed up for a few hours and then went back to bed and slept another 2.5 hours. Geez, I mean it’s not like I closed down the bar. My sister Kris came by and showed me how to use my new blog she set up for me. Sooooo if you want to check it out you can go to: I will be posting updates there. I may continue to post on FB and then copy and paste there too – haven’t really decided yet. Kris is sooo computer savvy – unlike me lol. Haena came by for awhile after the color run. She had a blast. I feel so bad for her, the poor girl worked 8 hours Friday, left at 430pm Friday afternoon for Iowa for a soccer game, traveled back Saturday and then had the color run today. I’m sure when I was 20 it wouldn’t have fazed me, but just thinking about it exhausts me. Not sure what’s on the agenda tomorrow. I’m hoping to hear from Barnes tomorrow and may try and talk my Mom into driving me to Chatham for a pedicure – these feet are a mess! OH I got the giggles last night. When I went to bed I was kind of chilled and realized my head was freezing lol. I had to pull the covers over my bald head so I could go to sleep. Guess I’m gonna have to start sleeping in a beanie or something. What do these bald guys do? I mean do you get use to it? I kept rubbing my head to try and warm it up lol. Once again, something new to get use to. I did get outside and enjoy some of this beautiful weather. Hope you all had an awesome Sunday. Keep the Faith!